2006 - 2022

We found each other 16 years and 3 months ago. Bijou came into the pharmacy and told me you were in a bush behind the hospital. When I lifted you out of the bush, you were so limp. I did not think you would make it through the night. I fed you as much as you would take and put you in a tote with a blanket and lamp. I remember saying, "Let's see if you make it through the night little guy." You woke me up in the middle of the night crying for more food and I remember you fighting me when I tried to take the bottle away, but I was concerned you were going to pop because I saw your belly starting to extend. I should have known then what you would be like with your food. At that time, my plans were to get you healthy and up to age and weight standards to find you a forever home. Little did I know you were already in it. When the time came you met those standards I said nope, he is mine after everything I had to do to take care of you. You were with me in my final months of the Navy and moved across country with me to Illinois. I did not want to stress you with too many moves and I went ahead to Chicago and when Kyoung and I found a place a few weeks later, I came back to get you and we started the next chapter of our lives together. You were with me through so many bad times and so many good. You were one of the only constants in my life, my rock. I remember getting off work many times and feeling good knowing that you were at home waiting for me. You were protective of me and in your early years not many people wanted to get too close to you. Everyone said how beautiful you were and later how much they loved your very unique personality. You loved your rabbit fur mice and chicken. I had to chase you out of my wine numerous times and you preferred red to white. There were so many nights and weekends sitting at the table working on school work and projects and playing games on the computer and you were always there. Many times laying on my arms while I was trying to type. You always slept with me and often at the foot of the bed. You were never too keen on the other pets that came around rather it be just a visitor or when I brought Isis, Khaleesi, and her kittens home. Isis loved you and would have spent more time curled up with you if you had let her. They were not yours, but you tolerated Khaleesi and her kittens as well as I could have hoped. You never were never shy with people who came to the house. We could be playing games at the table and you would just lay down in the middle of it regardless of what was going on. You made sure everyone knew this was your house and that you were there. I will never forget your large dilated "Puss'n'Boots" eyes and the tilt of your head into my shoulder when you were begging for the food on my plate which you were very often successful in getting whether intentionally on my part of not. The very first time you met Sean and he made breakfast at the house you stole his bacon right off his plate and he chased you down to get it back. You loved chicken and strangely you like broccoli. You would always come running when their was food brought out. Comically enough you made so many people laugh when you got the White Castle slider box stuck on your head. Sean was not a cat person until he met you. You always made him feel better when he had a hard day. Your forehead bumps and curling up in our laps or on our chests were so comforting. I have so many beautiful and fun memories with you. I hope you know that if there was anything more I could have done to give you a longer and better quality of life, I would have done so. Making this final decision is something that will haunt me until the day I get to see you again. You deserved the very best life a cat could have and I am heartbroken you are gone. I think you were holding on for me. You gave me that last night to be with you. You slept on the couch and I slept on the floor next to you. My world is crushed now that you have departed. I struggle through the day. You were one in a million and I loved you more than anyone could understand. You were my child, my friend, my little boy. I am so grateful to have you in my life and I will forever keep you alive in my heart, memories, and soul. I miss you so terribly and it hurts so much that you are not here. I take solace that you are no longer suffering and I hope you know that if there was anything else that could have been done to keep you here, comfortable, and happy I would have done it. You made so many people fall in love you baby boy. The outpouring of emotion so many people have right now with your passing is overflowing. I could write so many more pages of memories with you that it hardly feels fitting that this is so short, but all the memories are playing constantly in my mind and heart. You will never be replaced or forgotten and the love I have for you will continue to endure until that joyous day when I get to see you again. When my time comes I hope you will be waiting there for me and we are united. Until that time, be at peace my love. Go find Louis and Winston. Lisa sent it out for Radar and Joey to come find you. Until we are united again, please visit me in my dreams as often as possible. I miss you terribly and so very much look forward to when I am with you again.